Thursday, 10 January 2008

help me somebody


hello everybody. my name is ally and i have a problem. james bond was not my first. oh no. before him there were fifty more. fifty together all at once at the same time. me and fifty of the bastards. i just couldn't help myself. i mean how's anyone supposed to resist ? it's a giant fibreglass icecream for gawd's sake and things don't get any better than that not even secret agent paperbacks with gorgeous covers.

our northern exile has been saved by the seaside. the seaside is ace. not the coast mind cos that's just the countyside with some extra water but proper seaside. blackpool morecambe fleetwood . but salvation comes at a price and now all art and beauty is nothing to me since i have been dazzled by the majesty of the giant fibreglass icecream. i can't pass one without oooohing and aaaahing and taking a million pictures and i dream of nothing but a giant fibreglass icecream of my very own. i still can't quite believe that i haven't been sentenced to a lifetimes hard labour for robbing one but it's just in my imagination that i'm dragging one down the golden mile being chased by the sweeney.
so for now i make do with fifty first class and jonathan richman on constant repeat and scheme evil and dastardly schemes in readiness for margate and southend...

jonathan richman and the modern lovers - ice cream man

7 comments:

Davy H said...

When my littlest daughter was a toddler she actually used to think these were real ice creams.

I think one would go lovely in your new gaff.

Beth said...

Have you found the giant mirrorball yet?

Planet Mondo said...

Now you're a Londoner - how about treating yourself to a trip to sunny Southend on Sea? Only About 40 min's on the Fenchurch Flyer. Plenty of these and doughnuts that go up a conveyor belt and everything.

BLTP said...

Oh they are beautiful here's my latest find
http://living4pleasurealone.blogspot.com/2008/01/happy-new-year.html

We may just have to head off to brighton with a wheelbarrow and some boltcroppers, you distract e'm......

ally. said...

they are real they are real (just slightly firm) and sadly one wouldn't fit in our pad even if i managed to rob one
and beth we have danced many an afternoon under the world's greatest disco ball - i'd imagined you in kentucky or tucson or in a trailer park somewhere desolate and not in yorkshire. must look at profiles more.
the fenchurch flier sounds a wonderous machine - we'll be on it.
and bltp distracting is my middle name
x

Beth said...

Glad to hear the disco ball has worked its magic for you!

And I've often imagined I'm in Kentucky or Tucson or a trailer park too... *sigh*


x

FiL said...

Dear Beth, how could you want to trade in Yorkshire? Why, you have the Harrogate Turkish Baths! Jorvik Viking Centre (where I once very nearly met a sticky end)!! And the magnificent wildlife of the Leeds train station taxi queue on a Friday night!!!

And Dearest Ally, please do remember your promise to lift a pint to my Dear Old Uncle Don if ever Southend you visit...